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How to maintain the freshness of your relationship

December 30 2005
07:00

For many years, hard to maintain the freshness of sexual relations. Monogamy, of course, contributes to long-term relationship, but sexual interaction with the same partner for 30 years, and perhaps more, will inevitably get bored, and boredom is not just eating away at the joy of relationships, it can cause infidelity and thus provides them with more serious threat.

Assume that sex without episodic change of partners, ultimately, be sure to get bored - hence, probably underestimate the role of long-term relationships, and the ability of couples from year to year covershenstvovat their mutual adaptation. Changes unavoidable, even for those who manage to avoid boredom. That passionate uncontrollably, which characterizes the first months of a love affair with time inevitably dies down.

For many it is more than offset by ease and comfort that brings communication with the loved one whose body has become so accustomed to a close, and whose sexual rhythms adapted and adjusted to your own. Long-term lovers, thoroughly learning the needs and preferences of each other, know what general steps deliver the greatest joy and trust each other so that in connection with certain methods of sexual anxiety lose their sharpness.

Why are not all stable pairs have strengthened their sex life?

1.Seksualnye feelings remain the same and only change our attitude towards them.

2.If you want to identify the actual cause of tarnishing your relationship, look at sex in the general context of your life together. If the depressing monotony or shade of alienation permeate everything you do together, and it does not give you any joy, then, and from sex to expect something else is impossible. If the monotony of your relationship is progressively increasing, you need to find out what exactly broken between you and, if necessary, even to seek professional help to the extent possible to restore the mutual feelings.

If you are satisfied with qualitative aspects of your life together, it still makes sense to consider the prerequisites for sexual indifference. Perhaps you are bored because sex has become too predictable.

If you turned it into an unwavering routine or your sexual repertoire is too poor, not surprisingly, affirmed the spirit of uniformity. However, if you're bored, despite the fact that you are never afraid of innovation in the field of sex and tried different versions of sexual possibilities, then probably you have unrealistic ideas about what should be the sex. If so, then you should just change your expectations. And learn to experience the joy of the sexual relationships that you have developed.

To change long-established routine sex life is not very easy. First of all, need to come to terms with the idea of change, because as long as both of you will take everything that happened between you for granted, the only way to sex, all the way and will go on. You should make a very small, subtle changes in a monotonous environment, for example, just one day leave the light if you usually indulge in love in the dark.

Or change the sexual attitudes, which may be unusual for you, but, nonetheless, deserving of attention. In discussing these changes with your partner be careful that he did not have the impression that you are criticizing him. Do not dismiss immediately any offer of your partner without first thinking over and discussing it.You will have time to get used to the idea and to overcome any inhibitions and braking you can feel (especially if his proposal is different at the novelty and surprise).

Use the game of fantasy, dreams and desires to open a new form of sexual activity that you would like to try. Maybe in the past you were such forms of sexual intercourse that you enjoy and that you'd like to experience again. If you find it difficult to express their wishes in words, you can specify what you want from your partner to do it for him. Reconciled with the fact that the passion, enthusiasm, strength of feeling that you cherished in the early stages of sexual relations lose their brightness.

Until you learn to appreciate what comes in return, you'll consider this a more relaxed, less frantic phase of relations as a solid gray.

Learn to appreciate the present. Remedy against boredom is not entrenched in the fact that, for example, to search for new levels of excitement - erotic literature and films. Such tactics can add zest to when the relationship somewhat stale, but only if applied in moderate doses. If they are used as a last resort, the natural course of events would lead to complete loss of illusions. Repeat with your partner all the good techniques that were decorated with your sexual relationship. That may be, will not that exciting, as once, but at least be reliable.

As you feel more balanced in each other's company, you can successfully continue an intimate relationship than it could have been you in a state of tension with a new partner. During sexual intercourse, will focus on physical sensations. Live in the moment and place: Do not compare with what happened in the past, and not fantasize about what you would like to have in the future. We should not forget that all sexual activity from start to finish - a two-sided process. Of feedback you get as much joy, how much fun you brought yourself a partner: the great joy he experienced in sexual intercourse with you, the more he will want to please you.

Material provided by the portal Medicus.ru

See also:

When sex becomes a disaster

Spermatozoa-killers or how to escape from the "horns"

How to "calculate" good lover?

Sex guide. As tempting in different countries?

Ten signs that you urgently need a sex ...

And other materials heading "Love and Sex


Константин Дятлов

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