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Jokes ... (March 30, 2009 Issue 1)

March 30 2009
05:08

If you are afraid to get better, have a drink before you eat 50 grams of cognac.
It dulls the sense of fear.
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Husband and wife late at night watching the transfer of "The Lucky!"
Wife:
- All I'm going to bed!
Male playfully:
- Me too!
Wife:
- But I warn you, I immediately go to sleep!
Male:
- Well, then I will use the "call to a friend!
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Call the police.
- Hello, police?
- Yes.
- I take responsibility for the boomers.
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These girls - at least where, as we boys - though nobody.
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And you know why dogs raise a paw when he wrote?
Because many, many years ago a dog was writing all the time on one
The same fence. A few years later he was rotten and fell on the dog, crushing
her death ...
Now all the dogs when he wrote, adhere to the fence.
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Classification of male attitudes towards women:

1) I can, I want to, you can - (ideal)
2) You can, I can not feel - (a little worse, but it happens)
3) I want, I can not - (crappy, but you can live)
4) You can, I want, I can not - (bad)
5) I can not, I do not want and will have (full-back ...)
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Three gradations of age:
All night drinking, walking in the morning as though the whole night sleep
All night drinking, walking in the morning as though the whole night drinking, walking
Throughout the night sleeping in the morning as though the whole night drinking, walking
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Conductor at the bus stop shouting the driver from the rear platform:
- Nick! Wait a bit, there's still one person running!
A few seconds later:
- Nick! Let's go faster, I know him - he has a travel!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Pensioner in a holiday home acquainted with the lady of his same age
and said to her:
- I - a representative of the oldest profession. Sleep for the money.
-?
- Caretaker I ...

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