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Jokes ... (March 28, 2009 Issue 2)

March 28 2009

Vchepa on zheleznodopozhnom pepeezde Kpasnovo by residents of the village was
ppedotvpaschena ygpoza samovozgopaniya tsistepny with spiptom.
Blagodapya samootvepzhennosti myzhskoy half of the villagers finally arrived to polynochi
danger samovozgopaniya was sokpaschena napoloviny.
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Mom asks young son:
- Sonny, well, you still have not broken all the toys that you gave the pope?
- No, Mom. Left alone. Hammer.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Man comes to the doctor and complains:
- Doctor, my daughter smokes very often.
- And how old is she?
- Five, but I am taking action: The porridge is not eaten - a cigarette is not received,
dishes not washed - flew past the pack, but still a pack
a day away!
- Well, you're really not worry, now all the smoke, here I am, for example,
began with two years of smoking.
- Yes, I understand everything, but in her position ...
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A guy walks into a grocery magizin, goes to the salesgirl:
- Girl, please tell me how much he won dick?
Saleswoman with bulging eyes:
- What??
- Sorry, lost in thought.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- Do you share my opinion, my dear?
- Yes, dear. I agree with him and being in two parts. First, I reject
completely, but the second I totally disagree.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Drunk standing on the street and screaming with laughter:
- Miracle, I just saw a UFO!
- So you actually saw a flying saucer? - Says he
An elderly man with a huge mustache.
- I can swear to you this, madame!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Two friends meet after a long time.
One another:
- Oh, I see you, all pregnant!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A man returns home late. The wife snatches:
- Why so late?
A man is justified:
- The work was, we plan on fire!
My wife is in tears:
- No you do not you all ...
From the next room responds son schoolboy:
- Yeah, Mom, kidding! We plan yesterday with the boys set fire, a fig it does not burn!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
From the conversation between two friends:
- Do you think sex with him or not?
- Perespa, if you like ...
- Yes, but he is so conscientious ...
- Calm down, the conscience is not transmitted through sexual ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
The pharmacy runs scared guy:
- Girl, how much is an enema?
- But we do not have enemas.
A man thought a moment and says:
- Then please give, 100 pipettes.

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