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Jokes ... (May 27, 2009 Issue 1)

May 27 2009
05:38

- Doctor, I have five members!
- Hmm, really. How do you sit on the pants?
- Like a glove!
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- What is the difference between a man and expensive jewelry?
- Expensive jewelry a woman is always satisfied.
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Son says to his father:
- Dad, I want to be a pathologist!
- Over my dead body!
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A husband and a neighbor playing chess. Suddenly comes back from
trip wife. Neighbor jumps up and jumps out the window.
The next day a man comes to visit him in hospital.
- What are you suddenly jumped?
- Do you know ... Somehow, I was afraid for you.
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Quarrel with two Hollywood stars:
- Do not order from a lady. You do not even know who your mother and grandmother!
- Indeed, about my grandmother say different. For example, it is - you!
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Truth in the wine. Rastvop 1:6.
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Man wanted to buy a car on credit, and money for a down payment
and not enough. Vechepom he passkazyvaet about his wife.
- Do not passtpaivaysya, dear. I have in the account five thousand dollapov.
- Five thousand? Where did this money?
- You know, it can and sentimental, but I took myself for regulations are
postpone any dollap paz, as we're making love.
- Lord, if I knew about this panshe, I would long ago bposil flawless functioning
and picked up your vsepez!
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Mature wife remembered his childhood and decided to visit that school
yard, where they first met. There they found the tree on which
they once carved his initials and a heart, and kissed each other in the same
corner where they had once kissed the first time. On the way home they
suddenly found a wallet is packed full of money, and, of course, decide to
to assign. The next day they come to the two police officers and
ask:
- We question all residents in the area, could not find anyone
Yesterday purse full of money.
Wife denies everything, and her husband, feeling guilty, decided to confess.
- You'll have to excuse me - my wife says - he is already old, and with his head
He ... you know.
However, my husband insists:
- No, I'm quite sane. Yesterday, when my wife and I returned
from school ...
- Clearly, - said one officer to another - have gone further.

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