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Jokes ... (May 26, 2009 Issue 3)

May 26 2009

Ilya of Murom rode to the stone at a crossroads. It reads:
"To the left you go - a thousand find, you go right - lemon dig directly
go - the devils face nabesh. "And at the bottom of the stone something else
small-shallow, not to dismantle it is written. Tears of Ilya of Murom from his horse, went to
stone, leaned over and reads: "If you're so curious, then further
foot trample! "Looking back, a horse, and vanished without a trace ...
- Oh well, blah! Okay - thought Elijah, hiding behind a rock, - wait
Alyosha Popovich.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A man comes to a fortune teller. That card spreads, and says:
- So, the first thing you should remember - not far from your home
buried treasure.
- No, but it is too much! What are you, my wife conspired? You can
talk about anything except her first husband?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
In the rabbi's wife had a first birth. On this occasion he
assembled congregation, and said that, as children - is costly,
it would be good to increase the size of donations. And the company has decided
that the parishioners should increase its contribution, each time when the family
Rabbi growing.
But when, soon was born the sixth child, the entire synagogue was
resent. Then the rabbi said:
- Why are you unhappy? Do not you know that children - a manifestation of
God's will?
Here at the back of the voice:
- Since rain and snow - is also a manifestation of God's will. But it's there does not prevent
Still wearing a hood!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Ha bench before the student dormitory two missed it:
- Wan, give Blacks beat! - Says the first.
- Why? - Surprised the second one.
- And interestingly, they are bruises?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- Doctor pohmetologa called?
- Yes.
- What complaint?
- Why, doctor, binges tortured ...
- And often you have them?
- Yes, four times a year.
- And for a long time?
- Yes, three months ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A man - a fortune-teller:
- It seems to me, my wife is cheating with a neighbor!
- Diamond mine, how do we change such a handsome man?
- Yes, yesterday I came home from work, and the wives do not. A neighbor on the balcony
smoking in underwear!
- So what?
- So he's in her underwear smoking!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Calls "well-wisher" in the traffic police and told us that only that
such a highway seen rushing to the speed of 240 km / h 600-th "Mears"
the number 4656іKLMN. Gibddeshnik wonders:
- And how are you at this speed and the time to notice the brand and number
write? "
- I caught up with him.

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