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Jokes ... (April 20, 2009 Issue 3)

April 20 2009
16:22

- This is a hostel?
- Yes, the first course of stones.
- Why the first?
- You see, panties hanging in the windows.
- A second Th?
- The second does not.
- And the third?
- Third is not!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
The doctor tells obese patients:
- You can eat whatever you want - and here's a list of what you should want.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Rides Vovochka with her mother on the bus, she said loudly enough:
- Mom, look what Uncle bald! Not a single hair on his head!
Mom whispered:
- Vovochka, quietly say, but then that uncle you hear.
One surprise:
- Mom, that he himself does not know this?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Daddy reads Vovochke Pushkin fairy tale about a fisherman and fish.
The first time the old man went to the blue sea to carry out the wishes of the old woman, second,
Three ...
Vovochka here and says:
- Dad, but still Dzyadok this, it takes ... Abnormal quite ...
- Why?
- What is he like the Loch last fro Dangle? Would long ago have asked for this
fish new old lady! Yes younger! And so the bra was the third number ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
In the sandbox, crying little boy.
Passerby says to him:
- So big, and cry.
- "Uncle, come on .. th!
- This small and swearing.
- Uncle, you .. d understand - something big, something small ..
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- Listen, a neighbor, yesterday, from your room swept a snicker, as if you brought
not a girl and a horse!
- Hmm, interesting idea! The next time you bring a girl!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Stern boss calls on the carpet of one of the most modest goals of subordinates.
- So ... So, you decided to act through my head! Bypassing the boss?
- What do I have in mind this was not. Yes I am ... Never in my life!
- Do not tell lies in my eyes! Told me everything! Are you on Sunday
not prayed to God to raise?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
TEST for the girls - "kilocalories and sex":
Stripping:
- With his consent - 12 kcal
- Without his consent - 187 kcal
Removing the underwear:
- Both hands - 8 kcal
- With one hand - 12 kcal
- Plus a slap in the face with one hand - 37 kcal
- Mouth - 85 kcal
Stretching of the condom:
- With an erection - 6 kcal
- Without it - 315 calories
Prelude:
- Search the penis - 3 kcal
- Search for G-spot - 10000 kcal
Pose "69":
- Lying - 8 kcal
- Standing - 712 kcal
Orgasm:
- The present - 112 kcal
- Simulated - 513 kcal
After orgasm:
- To stay in bed - 12 kcal
- Escape - 36 kcal
- Find out why he fled - 816 kcal
Dress:
- Calmly - 32 kcal
- Hastening the last bus - 98 kcal
- When his wife calls in the door - 1218 cal.

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