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Jokes ... (18 June 2009 Issue 1)

June 18 2009

- Do you know why I cry? - Asked the wife of her husband, leaving
department store.
- I know, but I kind of money.
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Are two dogs past the grocery store. One says:
- Shall we go? Myaska steal ...
- Do not you see - it says "Dogs not allowed!
- Fool you, who are aware that we are literate?
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The woman turns to the cosmetic surgeon:
- You might not realize something which intervene in my appearance with
to improve it?
Doctor some time examining it very carefully and finally said:
- Unfortunately, no! In our country, beheading is forbidden by law!
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- Why a tax return You give always 1 April?
- To then, in which case, you could say it was a joke.
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- Doctor, what do I have to constantly give up cigarettes and alcohol?
- Of course! I told you about this four weeks ago!
- I remember, I just thought maybe in science during this period was
perfect progress!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Surgeon calms the patient:
- You ask me what would happen if the operation fails? You do not
need to worry - you do not even notice!
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- Bro, going to the movies or something, slumped.
- And now comes something?
- Yes, some, like, "Siberian sirulnik.
- Or "Sirulny sibirnik.
- Do not Simbirsk mobile phone. "
- A can of Mobile seralnik "- well, such as stool on wheels.
- No, more likely, the serial cell phone, like our godfather.
- And, remember, "Serial mochilnik.
- When, exactly: "Cool Walker."
- Come on!
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There are two philologist. One says:
- You know, yesterday heard a word - the language break down.
- What word is that?
- Cunnilingus.
- Yes, shit, just break your tongue!
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Game show. For table game player is responsible for all the tricky questions
without using any clues. Host:
- If you answer the last question, one million will be yours. Just do not
come in fury from the question - choose your computer. Thus,
- Yes!
- What is the depth of vagina your wife?
A player for a long time frowns, rubs his head, finally says:
- Call a friend!

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