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Jokes ... (September 17, 2009 Issue 3)

September 17 2009

In the personnel department:
- Who do you work?
- Inspectors ...
- So, I write: "state inspector."
- Security ...
- Guard ... "
- Then - again with inspectors.
- So. Write: "inspectors - a repeat offender."
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The doctor comes to the bedside Moldavian and inspects it. After that Moldovan he asks:
- Doctor, I want to hear the truth from you, I promise to be brave, whatever that truth, tell me straight: I'm soon going to have to go back to work?
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6 years in tears Vovochka resorts to mom and she complains to her younger sister:
- She grabbed me by the hair!
- Vovochka, you should not be so upset: it is still small and does not understand what it feels like to drag by the hair.
Vovochka leaves. After some time out of the room again heard a child crying. Mom rushes into the room and asks the children:
- What is it?
- Now she understands everything!
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The blind beggar begging on the street. Suddenly, he feels that someone unzips his pants, then slips his hand in there and starts to caress his genitals. Beggar:
- Wow kicks! Oh-oh-oh!
Then the hand disappears. Blind, groping hands in the air, trying to find out who did it, but in vain. But his face still and shining with pleasure. A few steps away there are two Jews, who saw this scene, and one of them says to another:
- You see, Izzy, how can deliver a man pleasure, not while spending a dime.
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A young woman rushes into the church, ran to the altar on the go patting his chest and screaming priest:
- Holy Father, I want you to possess me straight to the altar!
- But ... My daughter, you're in the temple of God!
But the woman declines the bra, not ceasing to caress her breasts and that below, and says:
- Holy Father, I want you raped me, like a wild beast!
- My daughter, I do not put on the rank, I am a priest, and once again remind you that you are in church. In the end I just physically can not!
A woman removes the remnants of clothes, collapses at the altar and starts to squirm on it, still caressing herself in all places.
The priest turns to the crucifix and says:
- Jesus, tell me, what should I do?
- Yes you've finally take off with this cross, you idiot!
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The guy asks the girl, which recently met:
- Do you know the difference between a penis of sausages?
- No.
- In such a case, like to invite you tonight for dinner.
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Gathered once ghouls, vampires, and vampires in the cemetery.
In order to compete - who can suck the blood of more agile.
Well, bet a couple of hours, and ran away - mosquitoes tortured ...
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If you want to make a nice co-workers, drop them in the room when they divide the cake, and immediately run away, refusing to treat.

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