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Jokes ... (April 15, 2009 Issue 1)

April 15 2009
05:06

- Why Red Square was called the Red?
- You see, Sergei, is a very ancient history. When in 1147
the first inhabitants of the then little ...
- A shorter impossible?
- That's why it's called Red!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A telephone call:
- Miss Sanders?
- Yes.
- Miss Julia Sanders, who lives on Market Street, 224?
- Yes. What did you expect?
- Oh, I'm probably his call pulled you out of the bathroom?
- YES, dammit! What actually is it??
- Sorry, I did not get there.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Lying in bed in love couple.
He: - Why did you say you love me ... just after sex?
It: - And why are you telling me this just before sex?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Pposypaetsya ppogpammist a big hangover, povopachivaetsya,
and pyadom a girl is lying.
- Oops, first discovered the new hardware of the ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- Can you become old, eh?
- No, just you, my dear, I want less than I want.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
I was a child, parents often put in ygol ... to the left, ... top.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
In the circus.
- Honey, you can be clearly seen?
- Yes, dear.
- And nobody will interfere?
- Het, no.
- A comfortable chair?
- Yes, all right.
- Maybe, swap?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- And we have again a new machine - boasting boys on the street.
- But what?
- I have not seen it. Daddy all night in her gapazhe nomepa pepebival, pepekpashival.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A young woman came to the medical examination, and she was very uncomfortable for her
blurred figure. Undressed, she blushes and says the doctor:
- I feel very sorry, Doctor! I know that I need to monitor their weight!
Doctor, has begun to inspection, soothing murmurs:
- Come on you ... There is nothing to be embarrassed ... not that you are fat!
- Do you really think so?
- Of course - the doctor said, raising her stick to the language. - And now
Open your mouth and say: "Moo-oo-oo!"
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Fits 8 March, men in the department think that to give his two secretaries.
Head says:
- The best gift - a book. We must give them something useful for their development.
For example, our Tanya - it is smartly two words do not write it, so gave her a
nice big dictionary. Well, Alia about anything, what she or a boom-boom.
And it would be nice, and we make it useful.
- Got it, chief, will be done - say the men.
The next day, we get, say, they say, all right. Tanya bought a dictionary.
- Well, fine. This is all useful to us. And Alia in the same vein?
- Well, yes. To eradicate illiteracy.
- What, too, the dictionary?
- Why the dictionary? Kama Sutra.
- Why Red Square was called the Red?
- You see, Sergei, is a very ancient history. When in 1147
the first inhabitants of the then little ...
- A shorter impossible?
- That's why it's called Red!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A telephone call:
- Miss Sanders?
- Yes.
- Miss Julia Sanders, who lives on Market Street, 224?
- Yes. What did you expect?
- Oh, I'm probably his call pulled you out of the bathroom?
- YES, dammit! What actually is it??
- Sorry, I did not get there.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Lying in bed in love couple.
He: - Why did you say you love me ... just after sex?br /> She: - Why are you telling me this just before sex?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Pposypaetsya ppogpammist a big hangover, povopachivaetsya,
and pyadom a girl is lying.
- Oops, first discovered the new hardware of the ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- Can you become old, eh?
- No, just you, my dear, I want less than I want.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
I was a child, parents often put in ygol ... to the left, ... top.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
In the circus.
- Honey, you can be clearly seen?
- Yes, dear.
- And nobody will interfere?
- Het, no.
- A comfortable chair?
- Yes, all right.
- Maybe, swap?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- And we have again a new machine - boasting boys on the street.
- But what?
- I have not seen it. Daddy all night in her gapazhe nomepa pepebival, pepekpashival.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A young woman came to the medical examination, and she was very uncomfortable for her
blurred figure. Undressed, she blushes and says the doctor:
- I feel very sorry, Doctor! I know that I need to monitor their weight!
Doctor, has begun to inspection, soothing murmurs:
- Come on you ... There is nothing to be embarrassed ... not that you are fat!
- Do you really think so?
- Of course - the doctor said, raising her stick to the language. - And now
Open your mouth and say: "Moo-oo-oo!"
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Fits 8 March, men in the department think that to give his two secretaries.
Head says:
- The best gift - a book. We must give them something useful for their development.
For example, our Tanya - it is smartly two words do not write it, so gave her a
nice big dictionary. Well, Alia about anything, what she or a boom-boom.
And it would be nice, and we make it useful.
- Got it, chief, will be done - say the men.
The next day, we get, say, they say, all right. Tanya bought a dictionary.
- Well, fine. This is all useful to us. And Alia in the same vein?
- Well, yes. To eradicate illiteracy.
- What, too, the dictionary?
- Why the dictionary? Kama Sutra.

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