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Jokes ... (May 13, 2009 Issue 2)

May 13 2009

Doctor, how is he?
- Bullet - a fool, so that vital organs are not affected ...
- Thank God!
- ... But the bayonet - well, yes, a bayonet - well done ...
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Ancient old woman comes to the doctor:
- Doctor, I have shortness of breath.
The doctor, having listened carefully to her and did not find signs of shortness of breath, asks:
- And when it happens you have it?
- When I run I overtake the tram ...
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Husband and wife began to fuck. And then on the radio:
- Attention, attention, started World War III! In our town
drops an atomic bomb! Farewell, comrades ... - Weeping bitterly.
Wife - husband:
- Do you always so, back aches, the atomic bomb ...
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Designers finally have turned to ordinary people and became
design clothes for women and low. You should have seen
how funny she looks at the slim and high mannequins!
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- Do you call a girl, judging by his voice - Leggy!
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The officer stopped rambling yard doing nothing ordinary.
- Why are you here gad about? Who were you in civilian life?
- I was deputy head of the trading firm.
- Subordinated been?
- Yes! 10 people!
- What would you do if you saw how your slave hanging
- Do not hesitate to be fired immediately!
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- All men think of only one!
- Do not tell me there are goats that are on this and have no intention!
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Two Canadians are sitting at the bar and play a game of "Word" - one thinks of a word
and another, asking questions (round-square, dark-light, etc.)
must guess the word. Start: one put forth a "moose dick, the other
asks the first question:
- It's edible? You can eat?
- Well, in general, yes.
- Elk dick?
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Carlson once put his pants inside out. So a meat grinder.
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There are two friends. One asks another:
- Hello. Where are you going?
- Why, in the real estate agency.
- What do you want to sell an apartment?
- Yes, not a car.
- And you go to a real estate agency?
- Well, where else would! She is there for me for two years in a row anywhere
from the place does not move!

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