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Jokes ... (May 12, 2009 Issue 3)

May 12 2009

Children come visit a sick teacher. She lies in bed,
wet handkerchief on her forehead. The teacher opened her eyes and says:
"Normal, Water, please, Mum!"
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Talking two mothers:
- All tables in the courtyard of domino workout! Children have no place to play cards!
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- My friend recently from drinking coded. And what is convenient -
code is the same as at the entrance: 385 and keep holding it.
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In this rich family had a daughter ugly, her boyfriend started to walk,
and once his mother found the young men kissing.
She said sternly guy:
- I hope you do it with serious intent?
- What do you think? Not because of the fun now!
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At world competitions in the hijacking of vehicles:
Third place was awarded to the terrorist Abdul, who stole top secret
bomber with a top-secret airfield;
Second place was awarded to a terrorist Said for stealing top-secret submarine
boats with a top-secret submarine base;
First place was awarded to a terrorist Hatab for stealing a motorcycle from a biker
from the gang "Drunken Wheel." Posthumously.
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One oak tree - it's oak. One-hundred oaks - is Grove.
The devil - the devil. One-hundred devils - a mother-in-law.
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The woman - a creature RWD, cornering - arrogant.
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What makes a woman at the age of 8, 18, 28, 38, 48 and 58 years?

8 years - pack it in bed and tells her tale.
18 years - tells her tale to put her to bed.
28 years - to put her to bed, do not even need fairy tales.
38 years - she tells you stories, to put you in her bed.
48 years - compose her stories, just to stay up with her in bed.
58 years - does not get out of bed all day just to
do not listen, as she writes you a fairy tale.
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Two drug addicts in the ass obkurennye giveth home at night after a large
hangouts at the other end of town. Public transport is no longer walks,
but on a wheelbarrow of money they have left - the last panted.
Pass by the bus fleet. One narik, which has at least
something to think, says to another:
- Come on you hijack a bus, and on it back home doedem. I post here,
look to the elements did not exist.
Second narik climbs into the garage. The first is to ride, waiting for him.
It took 10 minutes to 20, half an hour - no buses, no narika.
The first does not stand up and peeks into the garage. And then the second nerve runs
from one bus to another:
- I can not find the bus number 7!
First narik stunned, turns his finger to his temple:
- Idiot! Hijack Number 9, We will go on Pushkin - and there on foot
to the house only 5 minutes.
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A patient with a doctor:
- Is it possible for the prevention of influenza pour cold
water and run around in shorts in the frost?
- Better flu than schizophrenia!

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