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Jokes ... (March 12, 2009 Issue 2)

March 12 2009

- Listen, recently read that some illnesses can be treated
exclusive cognac ...
- Oh, hell, and where it can pick up?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
I did not want to hear, lying on the operating table:
1. Blyaaa!
2. One thread seen my watch?
3. And why am I so yesterday kicked!?
4. Ebana mouth! In the instructions someone ripped 47-th page!
5. Come on, bring it back! Bad dog!
6. You, sir! He already has children, does not it?!
7. Well, now put pressure! Half an hour later the football!
8. Sister, let me ... it ... uu ... like it .... uh .... your mother ...!!!
9. Well, well, brother! If this appendix, then here is this garbage
10.'s Taint! Again, cut off the light!
11. All back! My contact lens fell out!
12. Well, dear colleagues! Today's operation - a good lesson for us all!
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Family of three (father, mother and small son) lunch.
Suddenly, my son asked:
- Dad, Dad, and when you met with her mother, where was I?
Father (angrily looking at his mother):
- Where, where - ...
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To have a good time to hold a wife and mother.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
You understand that already vzposly when:
- Driving a car is not always deliver fun wa
- You start to laugh at the jokes of their Parents
- You start buying shapfy, pepchatki and sun kpem
- You go to a football match popanshe not to fall in crush
- You smotpite in monitop kamepy observation in the store and think, who
that bald fat man, and then comes up to you, it's you from behind

You understand that postapeli when:

- You do not try to pull the stomach when the young and ppivlekatelnaya
girl walks into the room
- You can ppozhit without sex but not without glasses
- Your best one another in and povesnik vstpechaetsya with someone who is two paza
under it, and VARIATIONS this was not accused of underage sovpashenii
- You call at nine o'clock and vechepa sppashivayut: "I do not pazbudil?"
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A young man walks into a flower shop and sees the wall
Big banner: "Say it is flowers".
A young man asks one rose.
- As just one?
- Yes, I'm not talkative.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Woman heart-rending cries in the street:
- Help ... someone ... My child has swallowed
ruble ... he's choking ... Save!
Suddenly jumps out from the crowd of onlookers man, quickly
missing child's legs and begins to shake
and so, and that, until the coin falls out.
The mother begins to fervently thank the savior:
- Thank you, doctor ... If it were not for you ...
- But not for that, but I'm not a doctor, I have a tax
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A rich old man wanted to marry young. Tempting promises
golden mountains. But she doubted whether he could at least something.
Grandad says:
- I'll bring a doctor's note that I am still hoo!
The next day brings help with diagnosis: MTS.
A girl asks to decipher. Grandfather explains:
- "Can stand firm."
At night, my grandfather did not get angry in the morning and a young running
to a doctor for an explanation.
The doctor looked at the certificate and said:
- Yes, I wrote the truth. "It may just piss."

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