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Jokes ... (August 11, 2009 Issue 1)

August 11 2009
05:18

One farmer brought every day to sell on the market for a few hefty cans of milk. All local residents are very surprised that,
because they knew that he had just five cows. In the end, residents decided to ask him how he did it.
- It's simple: I come this morning to the barn and the cows say: "Well, my dear, that you'll give me this: milk or beef?"
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Is Ivan Tsarevich the woods. Suddenly sees - in the grass mouse sits. He rushed to her, was about to crush as a mouse with a human voice said to him:
- Do not push me, Prince Ivan, I am still of use to you.
"Well figs with you," - thinks Ivan Tsarevich, puts the mouse in his pocket and walked on.
Comes, comes, he suddenly saw - the frog is sitting. He rushed to it - like
crush, but did not - galloped away frog. It was then that the mouse and
useful.
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- What are the similarities between the deputies and diapers?
- And, both should be changed frequently. And for the same reason!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
- Sister, I live?
- Now you will examine Professor Isaac Emmanuilovich Braziler, he will tell for sure ...
- Professor, will I live?
- Oh, sick, why do you need this extra trouble?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Meeting at the hospital. Chief Physician Performs:
- Today, we are creating a new division that will solve all the problems in our
hospital.
Question from the audience:
- And who will be working in this department?
- First, the department will operate for 10 therapists
and 1 evtanaziolog.
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- Recently in a Japanese restaurant there was a case of mass hara-kiri.
- In, pancake, Japanese tapped!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Announcement: Attention! Yesterday from our zoo escaped tortoise.
Please finder expand it to 180 degrees.
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Honda cuts in the 600-th Mercedes, get out of the last guys,
open the left door Honda and start ironing kicked the guy and he does nothing that makes strange noises type - Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh ...
Boys continue, and that all Ooh, Uh Ooh, Uh, uh ... Well, they're tired,
stopped and asked a peasant:
- Hey, what do you all uhaesh?
And he answers:
- Uh ... YX .... At Honda's steering wheel on the right!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Let's go I'm in the hospital, will visit his son, my friend.

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