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Jokes ... (June 11, 2009 Issue 2)

June 11 2009
11:15

The U.S. government has demanded that China return the spy plane.
It is also required to return all the rockets that fall in the Chinese Embassy
in Belgrade, and accused the Chinese side in a clash with them.
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Foreign delegation arrived in the young Soviet republic
see how things are going at a construction site of communism. Come to the plant,
go to the shop where they make machines suited to the foreman, they say, tell,
how are you trouble, how do you reach such grandiose
success. Brigadier:
- Well, we work very hard, day and night in three shifts. First
shift, as it should be scheduled as the second and third - voluntarily
to as much as possible to give the country of production.
- And when do you see yourself at home, communicate with their wives, have children? -
surprised the delegates.
- And we specialize. Our team is doing on all machines, and other
team makes all children.
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The proven way to earn a million proposed VJ Savkov.
To do this for 4 thousand years old janitor work
and nothing is there.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Oceanarium. In an aquarium with fish, saw stands, swaying, his unshaven style.
Reads:
- Fish, Saw ... Yeah-ah, we should throw to drink ...
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Call the vet:
- In my opinion, my dog got sick ...
- And why you think so?
- Yes, it is already the third week from under the sofa does not get out, nothing to eat and
stinks!
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You have a cheerful mood in the morning, if:
1. Getting up before everyone else, you have their shoes domotsadtsev nailed to the floor.
2. On the stomach of a sleeping woman wrote marker: "I was here."
3. In the bus on the back of the Comptroller chalk secretly wrote the word "Hare".
4. On the stand, "Their searches militia hung a photo of his boss.
5. The zoo swapped plates on the cell orangunanga and Cabinet
Director.
6. Emerging from a crowded elevator, tossed riding on a stolen
from the zoo frightened skunk.
7. Calling in a textile factory carder, voice Chernomyrdin
advised them to scratch somewhere else.
8. Bath hung on the door placard: "Before you get a one-time pay
wash fun, think about whether to deprive themselves of the free
a constant pleasure to itch. "

You will have a bad mood, if
1. Putting his feet in the morning, slippers, find that there shat
Beaten on the eve of your cat. Trying to throw them into an animal to anything
has not led, as they were by someone nailed to the floor.
2. You were alone in a locked elevator in which someone threw
skunk.
3. In a crowded bus, someone slipped you by the scruff smoldering cigarette butt.
4. Passing a police booth, you saw your picture on the site
wanted criminals.
5. When you decided to scratch his ear walks someone a dog, you
advised to scratch somewhere else.
6. For the upcoming day, week already postponed you intimacy with his wife
you are preparing, as the assault of Everest.
7. After coming home from work early, find a bed next to his wife
another climber.
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On the day of the border guard in the city stagger drunken men in green caps.
On the day of Airborne bathe in the fountain drunken blue berets.
On the day the Navy drunken sailors everywhere.
Why do 12 April nowhere to be seen drunk astronauts?

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