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Jokes ... (May 11, 2009 Issue 1)

May 11 2009

The firm invites you to a chief accountant.
Schedule of work - a year after three.
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You can not say: "chlenchik" as it is diminutive
of "member". And where did you see a member who is reduced to caress?
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A young wife wakes young husband at work:
- Milochek, buzzing gudochek!
After 10 years of living together:
- Mudilo, buzzing awakened!
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Sit with the mother-in-law in the room. Mother-in-law thinks aloud:
- That's because life is flying fast - like not so long ago, was born
but already it's time to die soon ...
- It's time ...
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A man asked a waiter:
- Advise, please, what better to choose a wine.
- You are a lady?
- Yes.
- The one that went to the toilet?
- Yes.
- In that case, better take the vodka.
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For the Western mentality importantly - to achieve this goal.
For the Eastern mentality importantly - ppocess achieve this goal.
For pysskogo mentality importantly - constant wash debuggee
achieve this goal.
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Who's Who

Consultant - a person who takes hours with your hand and says
you time.
Psychologist - a person who looks at everyone else when a beautiful
girl walks into the room.
Professor - people with the skills to talk with other people
when they are asleep.
Teacher - a woman who once believed
he loves children.
Programmer - the person who solves the problem, which you did not know
in a way that you do not understand.
Lawyer - the person who can write 10-page document and call
his brief.
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Drunk guy sitting at the bar:
- How many degrees this vodka?
- 40.
- Hot!
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- Hello! This is a hotline?
- Yes.
- Drop me a power of attorney for your car!

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