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Jokes ... (October 10, 2009 Issue 1)

October 10 2009
05:22

It is worth Estonian policeman, passing it slowly drives a car backwards.
Dialogue
- ... Pachchemu form going backwards?
- ... Ulitstsa usskayaya not rasfernutsya magician!
Half an hour passes, goes to the same Estonian, backwards, but in the opposite direction.
- ... Pachchemu form again going backwards?
- ... Rasfernulsya!
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How parents respond to the question of the baby, "Where did I come?
Stork brought you in his beak (Russia)
God gave you to the summit of Mount Sinai (Israel)
Found you in a vat of lard (Ukraine)
We kupyly tebya in the market for ogromnye Dang (Georgia)
You have created our scientists in a secret CIA laboratory (USA)
Do not ask stupid questions, you moron. Better keep your mouth shut (Belarus)
The International Committee of the children sent you by mail after our persistent requests (Canada)
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Poor intellectual, came home in a strong drunk. Unholy row with his wife. Well he was very sorry - do not understand, do not like. Waved another glass, and decided to stop with all this mess. Opened the window and stood on the windowsill, then enters his wife. Instantly assessing the situation, said:
- Would you even debris from a captured!
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U.S. congressmen traveled to an Indian reservation, to ask local leaders about the future of the United States.
Injun took a long look at the pale-and then said:
- Engage in migration. At one time we miss the problem ...
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A man, weary from the hardships of the world, cried to the Lord:
- Good Lord, what is going on? Terms of lying, stealing, drunkenness, dirt, slovenliness! Lord, why do not you navedesh order not cleanse the world from the evil, not to restore the justice?
Heaven opened and there was the Voice of God:
- Man, just be honest, you work like?
- No, - confessed to a man.
- I created you in the image and likeness. Now you understand? "
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Saleswoman Gurieva from the city suffers from a chronic lack of sleep Kryzhopolya. She works in a grocery store and daily nedosypaet 5-6 kg of flour and cereal products ...
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There are two friends.
- What are you so sad?
- Why, now, the reception went to a shrink. You see, I never did in my life really did not, and I thought it was the result of low self-esteem. So I decided to see a specialist.
And he ...
- What is it?
- And he announced to me that the cause of all my failures - not too low, and high self-esteem!

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