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Jokes ... (April 9, 2009 Issue 3)

April 9 2009
16:07

Over the past week prostitutes in Moscow went on calls 458 times,
of them 402 times in residential areas 50 times for businesses and organizations
6 times on false calls.
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Commander clock with eight arrows! Two-time shows, while the remaining
rotate in different directions, confusing the enemy!
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A man brings to the analysis of three-liter jar of urine. The doctor asks:
- Why so many?
Man:
- I'm not greedy.
The doctor leaves, returned an hour later and finds the same patient.
Doctor:
- What do you want?
- I have a bottle waiting.
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Doctor:
- I can not do anything with your illness - it's hereditary.
- Then send the bill for treatment to my father.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
You've been to the doctor?
- Yesterday evening.
- He found you something?
- Yes! I had three thousand and two he took.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Newspaper ad:
Super-gypsy fortune-teller Cassandra, a hereditary clairvoyant,
wonders on hands. Hands sent by mail to .....
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- I have so little demand from her husband - only that he loved and understood me.
What else to take a millionaire?
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- Honey, was it ever, so that your husband did not come home at night?
- Only once, a month after the wedding. But I hope that he'll be back
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A cop car slows down for privyshenie speed and says:
- Here the maximum speed of 40 km / h, while you were driving 80 km / h. Where such a hurry?
- Why, you brought a $ 100 ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Dietitian to the patient:
- What is your weight?
- It is 116 kg and the maximum was 121 kg.
- A minimum?
- 3 kg 600 g.

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