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Jokes ... (June 11, 2009 Issue 3)

June 8 2009
16:17

Russian ppavitelstvo potpebovalo from China vepnut spy plane Nam!
Nam also wondering what do Americans go to $ 80 million
stuffed!
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Sex with a business woman.

- Is it possible?
- Come in!
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- How to kill a blue elephant?
- From the blue elephant gun.
- And how to kill a red elephant?
- It must choke until he posineet, then shoot out
rifles for the blue elephant.
- And how to kill a green elephant?
- It is necessary to tell him dirty jokes until it turns red, then
to choke until posineet, then shoot a rifle for the blue elephant.
- And how to kill a yellow elephant?
- Fool, yellow elephants do not exist!
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Father goes with a young son past the shop that says "wine".
The son asks his father:
- Daddy, Daddy, what is it?
- And this, my son, the High Institute of Public Education.
- Dad, what are these people?
- That, son, student.
- And why they all shake hands?
- And just today, they have exams.
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Two drunks walk along the promenade and suddenly hear the cry:
- Help! Help! Throw me a rope someone!
One wino looks over the parapet, he sees a drowning man in the river and says
another:
- You see, he changed his mind to drown, he decided to hang himself.
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- What are your lovely twins!
- No, I have a boy, he just very nervous.
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- How is the seller of used cars from a seller of computers?
- Seller of used cars know when he's lying to you.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Teacher in the theatrical institution - student-programmer:
- Tenderness be painted! Tenderness! But not this idiotic grin!
Well, imagine that you are looking at a monitor with OS / 2. Well. That is so
better. Now imagine the monitor Unix. Bravo! Excellent! Himself
Stanislavsky would be pleased.
Now picture a sense of outrage. Again, it is impossible. Well.
Imagine for a monitor of Windows 95. I asked my indignation, but not an explosion
rabies. Okay. Then imagine the monitor Windows 3.11. This
skepticism, rather than indignation. Imagine if Windows NT. I do not need
affectionate smile! I need anger! Well, let's imagine for
Monitor Internet Exrlorer. Oh! Resentment played perfectly.
Well, finally, themselves depict me some sense of presenting on
Lexicon of the screen. Young man! No need to throw up in the audience!
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Every day in market azepbaydzhantsy ppodayut pomidopy. Then ppihodit OMOH
and tramples pomidopy. After OMOH yhodit, azepbaydzhantsy
is returned and ppodayut ketchyp.

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