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Jokes ... (August 7, 2009 Issue 2)

August 7 2009
11:33

This woman can enter into a burning house .... To pick out a drunken man!
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- Comrade zampolit! And what is in the development of materialism in a spiral?
- Well as you say? For example, last year, when we are in our medical unit allowed the girls around, I'm from Klavka fucked gonorrhea, this year - syphilis. Well, on the next turn is already preparing for AIDS.
- And this case does not prevent?
- Hey, buddy, against dialectics not trample!
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Caught in a subversive group of Ukrainian and two Chukchi.
Ukrainian, as an advanced user, set the bomb, leads clockwork, shouting: "tick lads!"
The Chukchi are both paralyzed, pretended to the pendulums - rock
synchronous head and says: "Tick-tick, tick-tick"
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Expedition to the Amazon jungle explorers made its way through the thicket
to the local village, when suddenly came crashing drums.
Already in the village head of the expedition stops Aboriginal and requests
explain what these drums.
- Trouble, trouble will be when the drums fall silent! - Cried the Indian, and ran away.
The drumbeat goes on. The chief asked another resident.
- The trouble is, it will be bad when the drums fall silent! - He replied.
A minute later the drums fell silent. Researchers have panicked. Head
lacks the third native and requires clarification.
- Bad, very bad, the drums fell silent - blurted Indian. - Now
will be a bass solo!
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Meet with Abraham Moise. Abram says:
- Moishe, can you lend me $ 100? I'll give you a week later.
- Of course!
Moishe something from his pocket and puts them into the hand of Abraham. Abram reveals
Palm and exclaims:
- So it's a condom!
- That's it, ITS try to cheat!
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In America the Jew walks into a bar and the bartender turns to black people:
- I have whiskey, I realized, you nigger bastard?
The bartender, who was accustomed to remain calm in all situations, responds:
- Not exactly a polite on your part. After all, if I turned to you so you would probably be very offended.
- And we can try. Come on, I'll stand behind the bar, but you seem to be a client.
Jew stands behind the bar, a Negro comes up to him and says:
- I have whiskey, I realized, you filthy Jew?
Jew:
- And here niggers bastards are not served!
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Wife came into the office and saw her husband in order to table a photograph in a beautiful frame.
- Honey, she is always on your desk?
- Yes, dear! Every time I have a serious problem, I look at you and I feel better ... (My wife's mouth spreads from ear to ear) Because I am aware - that any issue can compare with this?
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If you have a car podvozimaya your girl has left her purse with a decent
sum, to give you a pity, but you conscientious people, still advertise in the newspaper, but in the main passenger omens indicate that she was bow-legged.

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