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Jokes ... (May 2, 2009 Issue 3)

May 2 2009
16:57

Professor student:
- Do not worry. On the exam - both in the theater. You - an actor, I'm a spectator.
- Well, then I'll call prompter.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
History professor, explaining to students how the ideal of beauty
with time, gave the following example:
- Miss America 1921, was sixty meter height and weighed seventy
three killogramma. What do you think would have won it today in the contest
Beauty?
- Hardly, - said one of the students - she is too old.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Chubais and met Bill Gates.
Chubais says:
- You know, Bill, I abruptly you will.
Bill Gates is precipitated:
- This is why, they say?
Chubais says:
- Well, here's see. You're a cool businessman, I'm tough businessman. You're a monopolist,
I am also a monopolist.
Bill Gates:
- Well? ..
Chubais:
- Just fuck you disable those you do not pay for Vind!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Instructor parshyutom jumping on a plane:
- First came the second went to a third gone. Parashyutiki not forget
do not forget ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
By 2001, the ninth year the Kremlin's new product factory of sparkling wines:
Semi-Soviet Sparkling
-------------------------------------------------- ----
At the service station for the new Russian:
- Something in my car does not go.
- Have you been air in the tires changed?
- Well, it should be done?
- What we have here is delivered fresh, Finnish, bottled ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
A man comes into the firm to declare "you need a manager." Shows the boss
their diplomas - a financial institution, school management, management courses, etc.
Boss:
- It's good. I need a smart manager. He has to take
our main sore point - Finance.
Candidate:
- With my education so without problems. How about earnings?
- Well, you're a beginner, assuming you still put $ 10000.
- Yes? But where did your little company takes money to pay such
money?
- Here. That's the first question that you have to decide.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Girls, today we have your guests arrive!
- Then you bottle!
- A snack with you and the women
-------------------------------------------------- ----
That was before life:
District committee, executive committee, and now continuous administration!

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