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Jokes ... (April 2, 2009 Issue 2)

April 2 2009

Knight Bryar married a wealthy daughter of the Duke. After three months off
a military campaign with its drugom.Drug asked him:
- Listen, tell me frankly. Why do you put on your wife chastity belt?
Just between us, she's such a straholyudina. Well, who on her Pozar?
- So what's the point! We return from the war, and I tell her - expensive, but a key
I lost!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
The wife swears:
- You bastard! Scoundrel! Bastard! I walk away from you! Between us all
over! Give me money for a ticket, the creature, I am going to my mother.
The husband hands her money.
- Scoundrel! And a return ticket?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
On the beach:
- The girl and the water is warm today?
- Man, what do you have forgotten, we're already fucked yesterday!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Doctor examines the patient with a fractured hand.
- And how is it that you ugorazdilo?
- Just wanted to get away from children.
- And in something pierced? In a tree?
- No, the bed fell.
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Vovochka with his girlfriend standing near the trailer.
- Well, here again, "for children under 16 ..."
- And why, one wonders, we even got out of bed!?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
The company is sitting over a bottle. No one, however. Vasya pours
the glasses. Petya closely monitoring the process.
- Stop! Enough! Are you stunned? - Peter suddenly indignant.
- Yes it is Well I tell you - surprised Vasya.
- Ah-ah-ah-ah ... Well then a little splash
-------------------------------------------------- ----
The taxi ride three: American, Jew and Russian. At a sharp turn
taxi departs from the road and crashes into the gorge. An American in fear of reading
prayers, Russian - all tiles three-story floor-mat and the Jew yells to the driver:
- Chef, the counter is off!
-------------------------------------------------- ----
In the emergency room doctor talking to a guy.
(B) - Well, as it happened to him?
(M) - Well we were sitting, then with a friend, waiting for the guests. Decided to take a shot of vodka,
so that means not bored. I gave him money, the store sent,
and he, therefore, zakuson cook.
- Well, of course.
- Yes. And this bastard, you know, Tama spotted a decanter, and bought it.
And a tip of money is not left!
- Well, of course. ... What's good?!
- Duc - absolutely!
- Well, you know, I would place it on your entot decanter, sorry
your ass would be stuck!
- Well, Doctor, you and so you know, why ask?
-------------------------------------------------- ----
The eternal struggle of the feminine with the masculine ending ...
-------------------------------------------------- ----
Die old Irishman. Near his old friend.
- Friend, I am going to die, to fulfill my last request. Under my bed
is an excellent bottle of whiskey, which was rozlito a day when I
was born. Please, pour it on my grave, that all my bones they
soaked ......
- Of course a friend, you can first I had passed through the kidneys ?!...
The company "Proctor & Gamble" has released a new gasket Always + +
especially for women - programmistok.

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