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Jokes ... (July 1, 2009 Issue 1)

July 1 2009

- What would life be? We do not go anywhere: not in movies or the theater.
- What are you talking about the small stuff - the man. - Who I am in the last year
drove to the clinic with a broken leg, do not you, or what?
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- I have a mountain - one friend said the other. - My husband, yawning
again dislocated his jaw.
- What do you say to him, this time told?
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- Honey, I'd like to see you came with me as with our dog.
- What do you mean?
- Nothing special. Just feed me and issued a walk.
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Blonde calls her boyfriend:
- Help me to lay tile, I do not know how to get started!
- And what should it be?
- The box was painted a tiger.
Shows him the puzzle scattered on a table.
That some time looking at the table, a box and says:
- Firstly, we can never add up to this tiger, and,
Secondly, I think we should put all the flakes "Kellogs"
back in the box.
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- Sir, you have to inherit three million dollars, the palace
and a dog! - Said the lawyer.
- What breed of dog? - Asked the Prince.
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- Not today friends - complains one friend to another. - Ask
recently loaned one thousand rubles, and this kid I refused!
- Hey, I just have to warn you that I also goat.
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Recipe for "Beef in English:
Take a large piece of beef and walk away without saying goodbye.
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The brief summary of "Crime and Punishment:
About how Rodion Raskolnikov cut some attendants.
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Sit two convict in prison, dream.
One says:
- Here we go out with you out of jail, going to the store, buy a loaf of bread
Butter ... I kus you - kus I - kus you - kus, kus-kus I ...
Suddenly, the second convict as close up to him in the face.
- For what?
- And to you, bastard, half do not bite!
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The husband asked his wife:
- I wonder how do you know about all those things that do not advise
to make our daughters?

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